You might have read about them online, seen them somewhere in your Facebook feed, or actually know a girl who is one. You guessed it (probably didn’t), I’m talking about Sugar Babies… For those that haven’t heard of this slightly cringe term before, a ‘sugar baby’ is basically a young woman that dates an older (usually richer) man in exchange for gifts and money. The most popular site for Sugar babies, SeekingArrangement.com, has claimed that thousands of female undergrads have joined the site, with the average female student walking away with a cool £5000 a month. So in the name of journalism, our writer Yvette signed herself up and tried her hand at sugar baby-ing. That’s a word, right? Anyway, here’s what she found… “My first challenge was uploading a picture to the seekingarrangement.com. Due to the site’s rules, I wasn’t able to message a guy until I’d uploaded a picture. They don’t need pictures to message girls, though. Talk about double standards. My first instinct was to go to Google and search ‘Hot brunette pic’ (Sorry copyright imaging!). However the software on SeekingArrangement.com informed me that they knew that this was a copyrighted picture. Damn. Foiled already. I decided instead to shoot a ‘half-showing-my-face-but-not-really’ shot. Mysterious is my middle name…
In between adding the final touches to my profile, powering through my bottle of wine (Dutch courage) and trying not to cringe, I was finally done. The next step was the one most girls would be looking forward to. Talking to guys. I got my first message in within minutes of joining the site. *Ahmed, quickly informed me that he was a normal decent guy, born and bred in Sheffield, and
that just wanted a girl that he could “spoil and be friends with”. He also assured me that he had gone out with a girl from Sheffield University before whom he was still friends with. I was soon inundated by a flood of messages from what felt like almost every (creepy) guy on the planet.
There was the straightforward one.
“A bit brutal”
After sifting through my many options (nothing like a dating site to make you feel attractive and wanted….) I decided first time was a charm and I asked Ahmed if he fancied meeting over a cup of tea, so I could find out more about him and what exactly he wanted from an ‘arrangement.’
Costa and Starbucks.
Keeping it classy. All throughout the next week, I struggled with the decision of whether or not to meet up with him, or call it a day on my secret sugar baby life.
My friends were torn between “But it’ll make such a good story! Think of the 1st and suck it up.” and “Don’t be stupid it’s so not worth it!”
Angela Bermudo, SeekingArrangement.com’s Media Officer, says that the website was “mislabeled as being a service, when it is in fact as far from it as any relationship you and I enter into.” But to me, it seemed pretty clear what the men on the site wanted, and it would be naïve to believe that any, or even some of these men were actually looking for a real relationship. I couldn’t imagine the struggles of a girl actually going through with being a ‘sugar baby’ because she needs extra cash, maybe to get through a month at Uni, with only a shitty student loan otherwise. My struggle was already real enough deciding between a better grade and my safety, so I can’t even begin to think how difficult it must be for them. In the end, I didn’t go through with it. Part of me was scared that I would constantly have to look over my shoulder wherever I went in Sheffield, and the other part just told me it was a plain stupid idea to go to these lengths.
So here you have it, the confessions of a sugar baby, who really only lasted a day.
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